Forgiveness the Gateway to Moving Through Grief

"Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different.  Letting go of the past that we thought we wanted." Oprah, The 21 Day Meditation Challenge with Deepak Chopra

I recently heard Oprah stating the above quote, and it resonated in that place within me that says, "Ah ha.  That is the key to what I have been seeking."  Little did I know that even though she practically said it in that statement, forgiveness could be the gateway to moving through grief.  Or, maybe it was the resistance to forgive that brought me to the gate and the willingness to allow Oprah's statement to work through me moment by moment that opened the gate.

Sitting with the statement, patiently a clear path began to unfold before me. When I say patiently, I mean being with it moment by moment even when it feels like I am getting nowhere. I mean after sitting with it in the quiet I got up and continued on with my day.  I mean having the faith that what looks like no understanding, no progress on the outside doesn't mean it isn't "working."  I could feel that it was hitting on a place within me.  I didn't understand.  I couldn't put it into words, but I was willing to wait.

After waiting with it a couple of days and many tears from my core I began to feel the lightness, the freedom we so often hear we receive through the process of forgiveness. I felt like a secret had been revealed to me.  So many times I had been willing to forgive but felt it had alluded me.  In this experience I had learned that by opening up to it and allowing the process to move through me on faith,
the forgiveness had come to me and yes it truly gave me the feeling of being set free. 

Two in One

Today I had an awareness while processing my thoughts and feelings out loud with a friend. When I feel off kilter and I hear myself saying, "I don't know. I just don't know," what is really going on for me is I'm not in control. Being in control gives me the illusion of feeling like "I do know."

What I have also noticed is that the times I had serenity is not when I was "in control," but rather when I was "in faith." Faith that it is all unfolding in the highest and best way, even when I don't see it, don't understand it or (believe it or not) don't like it.

So, how is this a two in one re-minder? It's two in one because, once again, I remembered that processing things out loud is often all I need to come back to a bit of wisdom I already have. Try it, I bet it will work for you, too.

Let It Be

Early this morning I received a re-minder from the lyrics of a song..."Let it be. There will be an answer. Let it be," by The Beatles.

So often when I experience stress in my life I forget this Wisdom. There will be an answer. "Stress is a fear reaction to life." Louise Hay re-minds me. When I am feeling fear it is because I am not practicing faith. Somewhere I have unconsiously chosen fear over faith. And then I am re-minded (by a song, friend, affirmation, reading) and I can consiously choose faith.

This morning when I heard the lines to that song I felt a wave of immediate re-lief....quickly followed by another wave of fear. So, I gently re-mind myself with the words of the song as a mantra/affirmation. "There will be an anwer." There IS an answer. I may not be consiously aware of it, but I KNOW there IS an answer.

At the center of my being, in the Truth of my being lies Divine Wisdom. In that place the answer exists, and in Divine Timing it will be re-vealed in my life. I know from past experience that although I think I want to know now, when the knowing comes it will be perfect (Divine) timing. I will understand. So for now. I rest in the faith that all is perfect in my world.

Namaste