Honoring Sadness

"Perhaps we would bear our sadness with greater trust than we have in our joys.  For they are the moments when something new has entered us, something unknown; our feelings grow mute in shy embarrassment, everything in us withdraws, a silence arises, and the new experience, which no one knows, stands in the midst of it all and says nothing."  - Letters to a Young Poet, Rainer Maria Rilke

My mother passed away about a month ago, in this time, I have experienced more sadness than usual.  I found solace in the above quote.  I notice I don't honor my sadness.  When I don't trust my sadness it becomes anger.  In those moments I fool myself into denying I was ever sad.

Some part of me believes a strong person doesn't get sad.  That trickster silently fools me into believing without conscious awareness that anger is my only strength and power. While I know that when I experience healthy anger it is truly strong and powerful, in these moments,  I watch, dumbfounded, as I  begin to destroy everything and every relationship in my path.

In sheer exhaustion and shame I scream inside the hollows of my soul, "What the hell!!"  I am quickly re-minded - Yes, indeed, I have powerfully created my own hell.

In that quiet moment of awareness, Wisdom's voice is heard and I re-member that true Strength does experience anger and is comprised of both joy and sadness.

"Sadness is the soul recognizing change." -M. Night Shyamalon

There is great change happening in my life.  Yes, Great Change.



Journal Prompt:  What feelings do you notice under your anger?

Saved

Changing People

"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude." - Maya Angelou

Leave it to Maya to tell it like it is! This is so true. I remember years ago finally realizing that I could not change anyone but myself. This was news to me, and I have to admit it was news I wasn't too excited about. At the time, I was sure that there were other people, besides me, who were making my life miserable.

When I finally accepted that I could not change them, and that I could change myself, I went to work on the latter. I was absolutely amazed. I would have sworn to you that those other people changed! As I took a closer look I was clear, the others had not changed at all, what had changed was my attitude towards them!

Today's journal question:

Is there anyone who you would like to change? How can you change your attitude towards them?

Connect More

What if we took this connecting thing to another level? Consider all the people who are currently in the wall paper of your life. Oh sure, you might talk to them or maybe you don't. We're talking about the people who are running in the background of your life. There are hundreds, thousands, but we barely even notice them.

It's the people driving in the cars next to you, the banker, the woman walking down the same store aisle as you. The people at the next table in the restaurant, the waitress or the guy walking down the street. The children standing in line for the bus or the lady in the office next to yours. The cashier, the man next to you in line or the receptionist at the doctor's office. This list could go on and on.

Who do they love? What are they hurting about in silence? What is their favorite color? What concerns them? What do they love to do? What did they forget about? Who are their friends? What do they wish for?

What if just noticing them or thinking about them made a connection that makes a difference? What if hundreds, thousands or millions of us noticed another person in some small but kind way?

Journal question for today:

Who is in the wall paper of my everyday life and what kind thought could I have for them today? How would this change my world?