Day 1 of 21 Days of Prayer Outside the Box

The idea for the 21 Days of Prayer Outside the Box came to me in a recent meditation.  Prayer is an important part of my spiritual journey even though there was a time that I really struggled with the whole concept. As a coach with a body, mind, spirit approach, I am sensitive to individual philosophies, beliefs and approaches and want to respect each one.  The thought is to share 21 prayers that are diverse in origin and create a space where those who choose to can join together as "two or more gathered" each day (on our own and in our own time) even though we are not physically together.

The First Prayer

As I was looking for prayers to include in the 21 Days of Prayer Outside the Box I did a little googling and decided to start with The Serenity Prayer.  This seems a little funny since it is really pretty "inside the box" (made popular by 12 step groups, one site calls it the most popular prayer in the world), but sometimes the best way out of the box is to start somewhere familiar.  Just stick your big toe out before you jump out with both feet.

So, if this prayer is new to you, I am grateful to have the opportunity to be the one to introduce you.  If it is one you already know I invite you to approach it as though you are experiencing it for the first time. Take it a little slower.  Stop with each word and really soak it up. This is a powerful prayer with a powerful message.  I know how easy it is to get going with these prayers without really being present to the prayer.  I invite you to become very present with this prayer at least once today and just be the observer from there.

God grant me the Serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
The Courage to change the things I can;
and the Wisdom to know the difference.

Note:

If you are interested, there is more to this prayer.  You can Google the full version.

21 Days of Prayer Outside the Box

Please join me here for 21 days of Prayer Outside the Box beginning December 11th. This will not be your ordinary prayer experience.

We will approach prayer as a powerful body, mind, spirit tool that honors the unique and personal paths of each of us. Some prayers in this series will be old (but maybe seen in a new light), some may be new to you. My hope is there will be at least one that inspires a joyful spiritual practice in your life.  Let's spend the last 21 days of this year in mindfulness, together.

Effortless Inspired Action

"When we force an action in hopes of creating an outcome we desire, we can actually block ourselves from magnificent possibilities." - Oprah 

This idea helped me this week in an area I have struggled with for years. I took a moment and acknowledged the struggle I was having and became willing to let go of the struggle. That in itself was a challenge. I noticed I was holding on to the struggle. I was using it as insurance against a very old fear. It went like this in my mind, "If I hold on to this struggle, at least I can prove that I am trying, that I've done all I can." When I became willing to let go of the struggle I was almost immediately inspired with another option. I felt inner peace. For me, that is priceless.

"If an action is born and inspired from the Truth of you, from within, it's coming from an essential and Divine place, supported by the energy that helps us effortlessly move towards our Destiny. When we force an action in hopes of creating an outcome we desire, we can actually block ourselves from magnificent possibilities." - Oprah 

In the past the reference to "effortless" was so out of my ability to comprehend that I threw out this entire concept all together. I was taught and bought the idea that effort is what it's all about.  I was so indoctrinated in this belief that I thought without proof of effort there was no possibility for peace.  I would ask, "How can it possibly be effortless?", and with that thought shut out the possibility completely. Now I understand that effortlessness comes from becoming totally present, sensing inspiration and taking action from that place.  In the past I spent so much time in my head arguing that any action even inspired action is not effortless (action takes effort) that I missed the opportunity to experience the ease with which it unfolds.   

Recognizing that what I was thinking and doing had become so habitual it was unconscious, I became really honest with myself which helped me to shift my thinking just enough to surrender.  Suddenly, I was able to allow inspired action to unfold and the first inspired action was inaction.  Inspired action, especially inspired inaction, had been scary to me in the past because although I believed in it, I had a longer history of forcing action, and had been "rewarded" with "approval" from those around me especially authority figures.  The outcome of inspired action was immediately and continues to be inner peace.  For me, this inner peace has gratefully proven itself to be a greater desire than what I had previously feared.

Turn It Around

Next time you are in a difficult spot try turning it around.  When you think something like, "This situation is out of control.  I need to control it."  Ask yourself, "Really, when I try to control a situation does it help?"  Actually it is the controlling that is causing the pain.  What if you just let the situation be, without trying to control it?

When you think something like, "I am afraid. I need to do something."  Ask yourself, "When I act from fear, how does that go?"  What if instead of doing something you chose not to do something for a moment?

Notice when you are propelled to change the outcome, manipulate the outcome.  Catching ourselves in those moments and choosing instead to be present first and active from the place of presence changes difficult situations into peaceful situations.

If your life has been full of difficult situation, you become present and you begin to experience peace, it may feel awkward.  This is a good sign.  Things have shifted towards what you really wanted when you thought you had to control it.  Peace is present.  You are present.  This is different than a life full of difficulty.  No wonder if feels awkward. Instead of turning away from the awkward feeling (which is the peace you now feel), what if you lean into it?

Blame and the Four Lies

Look for places in your experience where you are blaming another.  Look for overt blaming and covert blaming.  Even look for blaming self.  In these places where we notice ourselves blaming, is an invitation to return to our core, the truth of our being.  In the three concentric circles we find blame in the outer circle where we experience life in the physical.  Sometimes it can be helpful in this illustration to even imagine another set of circles as the other person.  As we place our attention on the other person, the other set of concentric circles, it is easy to see that we are far from our core.  In the outer circle things like, "He did this!" or "She did that!" or even "I'm so ________, how could I do that?" are what we believe is the problem.

As we notice the next circle, the in-between circle we begin to see our beliefs.  These beliefs are the filters that filtered out our true being and changed the frequency in such a way that it manifests as what we now experience that we don't like.  In this circle, "He is mean. She is so self-centered. I am stupid." are the beliefs/the filters.  Lenedra Carroll in her book, The Architecture of All Abundance," illustrates these filters as the four great lies.

"We are bad.
We are not enough.
We are limited potential.
We are alone."

She goes on to point to our core, the center circle, the truth of our being, "When in reality the profound truth is:

"We are intrinsic goodness.
We are whole and complete just as we are.
We have the potential of our divine heritage.
We cannot be separated from our divine Source."

Once we begin to re-member this truth, we begin to experience what we believed we lacked when we were focused on blame. We begin to understand the belief in separation that caused our need to blame.  We return to our center circle we re-alize what she says next.

"The negative and false beliefs have seriously eroded our esteem and even convinced us that we are not lovable.  In fact, we are loved beyond our ability to comprehend it.  Love is not outside of us. Love is not our mother or father or lover.  Love is not our family or community.  Love, in truth, simply is.  Love is.  Love is the essence of the life force surrounding us; it is what allows everything to have cohesion.  Love is both our birthright and our legacy; it is in the original blueprint of our Soul."

In the presence of unconditional love, which is always present in the present, there is no blame, there is no difficulty to be solved, there is only love.  All that seemed like a problem, felt like hell, was out of alignment simply expresses without judgement, moves fluidly and returns to truth.

Favorite Marianne Williamson Quote

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.  It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.  We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?  Actually, who are you not to be?  You are a child of God.  Your playing small doesn't serve the world.  There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.  We are all meant to shine, as children do.  We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us.  It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.  And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.  As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."  Marianne Williamson, From A Return to Love

Forgiveness the Gateway to Moving Through Grief

"Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different.  Letting go of the past that we thought we wanted." Oprah, The 21 Day Meditation Challenge with Deepak Chopra

I recently heard Oprah stating the above quote, and it resonated in that place within me that says, "Ah ha.  That is the key to what I have been seeking."  Little did I know that even though she practically said it in that statement, forgiveness could be the gateway to moving through grief.  Or, maybe it was the resistance to forgive that brought me to the gate and the willingness to allow Oprah's statement to work through me moment by moment that opened the gate.

Sitting with the statement, patiently a clear path began to unfold before me. When I say patiently, I mean being with it moment by moment even when it feels like I am getting nowhere. I mean after sitting with it in the quiet I got up and continued on with my day.  I mean having the faith that what looks like no understanding, no progress on the outside doesn't mean it isn't "working."  I could feel that it was hitting on a place within me.  I didn't understand.  I couldn't put it into words, but I was willing to wait.

After waiting with it a couple of days and many tears from my core I began to feel the lightness, the freedom we so often hear we receive through the process of forgiveness. I felt like a secret had been revealed to me.  So many times I had been willing to forgive but felt it had alluded me.  In this experience I had learned that by opening up to it and allowing the process to move through me on faith,
the forgiveness had come to me and yes it truly gave me the feeling of being set free.