Re-membering 2012

As I sit here on New Years Eve 2012 and look back on what a fabulous year it has been, fabulously difficult, my mind goes to all of the re-minders I had this year.  In my experience, whenever I have experienced great challenge or difficulty, I have also experienced great growth.  I have a friend who says, "Here we grow again!" every time I am chatting with her about something that is bugging me.  This year has been a great example of those things.  Great difficulty.  Great growth or shall I say great re-membering.

Difficulty. Struggle. Growth. Re-membering.  These are the things that point me towards what I believe is my greatest awareness this year.  Re-membering who I am.  Becoming more aligned with my Truth.  Experiencing me.  Joy.  I am so grateful.

It has been quite a journey.  I have had such awesome people to share it with, and I am so looking forward to the journey into 2013.  See you there!

Desire

"Desire for anything is the thing itself in incipiency." -unknown

Calm, Peace.

My mentor gave me an affirmation that says, "Nothing can disturb the calm, peace of my soul."  I have worked with this affirmation often over the years, and as I say it my questioning self responds, "Oh ya, this situation seems to be definitely disturbing the calm, peace of my soul at the very least, the calm, peace of my life."

During a recent meditation I had a realization about this affirmation. My questioning self was confusing the reality of my experiences with the Reality of my soul.  After years of repeating this affirmation it came to me while I was sitting in the peace at the eye of the storm that while my external situations appear nothing like peace or calm, sitting in my meditation, in fact right there in my soul was the ever present calm and peace that I had been affirming.  "To affirm anything is to assert positively that it is so, even in the face of all contrary evidence" -H. Emilie Cady.   Once again I am re-minded I do not repeat affirmations to make them so, I repeat affirmations to re-mind myself they ARE so.

The calm, peace of my soul is always there, and to experience it in my life (which is what my questioning self is so concerned about anyway) all I have to do is remember it. Align to it.  Connect to it.  

I sat in awe that at any moment of any day I can connect to the calm, peace that is ever present within me.  This fascinated me as I connected with it in the middle of what felt like an impossible crisis in my life.   Years of affirming this statement and another layer of understanding, connection, awareness and alignment is made clear to me. Truly I am grateful.

Bits

This morning I was feeling grateful for the bits of awareness that I might have in a day, and how those bits of awareness hook together over the years and turn into wisdom.  Wisdom that can guide me through life.  I was reflecting on how it is possible to be aware of this as I was today, and also how it is possible to feel like a complete bumbling idiot like I did yesterday. 

How interesting it is that the wisdom we possess can be so completely covered up by pain and circumstances.  As much as I talk of how we just need a gentle re-minder of something we already know, there are often times when I hear a bit of wisdom I have heard umpteen million times and I feel like I am sick and tired of hearing it.  Funny how when heard again in just the right moment it can be the very thing that uncovers the awareness and brings it rushing back as exactly the thing that helps to lift the pain.  I giggle at myself as I am then grateful to have heard it umpteen million and one times.

Today. Again.

How many times do I need to re-mind myself to stay in the moment?  One hundred.  A thousand.  Every single day.  How is it that this seemingly, incredibly simple thing keeps slipping my mind?  Maybe a post-it note or two thousand would help.  Whatever it is, I am realizing that how ever many times I must re-mind myself is worth it.  It is so worth it to savor the moment.  To taste, feel, touch, experience what is around me. It is so worth it to re-turn to that peace.  Ahhhhhhhh.

Fear vs. Intuition

In the years I have spent learning to listen to and follow my intuition I have found sometimes it seems like there is a fine line between intuition and fear.  As I have patiently worked with my intuition, noticing and practicing, I have found actually there is a pretty broad distinction and it is easier to distinguish than I had once thought.

Fear is not the only thing I have confused with intuition.  I have also confused it with intellect, and emotion.  Intellect tells me, "This is the reasonable thing to do, and I respond, "Ah, that must be my intuition."  Emotion tells me "I feel this way about that," and I respond again, "Ah that must be my intuition."  Fear speaks out the loudest, "Don't do that OR ELSE!"  And I recoil, cowering in the corner saying to myself, "Ah that must be my intuition protecting me."

Or is it?

I have learned intuition is none of these things.  I have dispelled my mythical thinking that it is even a close cousin.  Can we learn from our fear?  Yes, absolutely.  Do our intellect and emotion provide valuable information?  Yes, and saying intellect is a close cousin to these things is like saying an organic carrot is like an orange popsicle.  Actually, eating lots of popsicles has taught me something.  I get sick when I do that.  Oh sure, eating just one hasn't killed me.  It has taken a lot of introspection to see the yummy lure of the popsicle is not unlike fear as well!

What!?!  Fear is yummy!  I retort, "That is absurd! I don't want to be in fear!"  What I have learned is that response is fear itself holding me in its grip.  Keeping me in denial.  Actually if it weren't so yummy, why would I keep partaking?  There is something I crave about fear.  I crave the comfort of an old companion.  I crave the denial it provides, allowing me to continue wrapped up in the drama feeling, just enough pain to know it is there but not so much I actually face, walk through it and overcome it!

Intuition is the still small voice.  It can seem small and quiet compared to fear.  In reality, it is big, consistent and although it is gentle it is quite strong.  As I listen more consistently (and that is the key), I find I hear it easily.  I find the distinction becomes more and more clear.

Intuition re-minds me it dwells in the center of the three concentric circles and all the others, intellect, emotion and fear dwell in the outer two.  Intellect does use reason and often presents facts in its argument. "The fact is this particular thing has happened and if you look at these experiences you can see these results."  Emotion works with our feelings, "I feel happy or sad."  Intuition is Truth.  "I am Love, Wisdom and Good Judgement."  Holistically we are masterfully created to work with all of these together.  We master our world as we master the incredible synergistic art of working with them together.

Working together, intellect, emotion and intuition give us the tools to create powerfully.  Distinguishing the tools gives us the direction and mastery to choose which tool to use in each situation and which tools to use in conjunction with one another. As with so many things, practice and patience go a long way in developing these tools.   Become aware.  Learn from mistakes.  Keep moving forward.

Be - Express - Experience

BE more in alignment
     with your Truth
EXPRESS more in
     alignment with
     your Truth
EXPERIENCE more
     in alignment with
     your Truth

"He who does not know the village from which he comes will never find the village that he seeks." -Chinese proverb

Meditation Circle

Whether you are new to meditation or have been meditating for years, this group is for anyone who would like to deepen their meditation practice and experience a meditative community.

Tuesday, June 12, 7-8pm

Love Offering

Seating is limited.  Please call Tanya or email to register.

602-316-7207

tanya@dynamiclifecoach.net

50% OFF Group Life Coaching

Group Life Coaching
Balance Your Life Now!
at the Dynamic Life Coaching Center
1701 S. Mill Ave., Suite 103
Tempe, AZ 85281
Tuesday, May 8th, 7-8:30pm
Normally $35 Register now half off for $17.50
"Like" Tanya Jordening Whole Life Coach on Facebook and receive an extra 10% off. Register for $14.
Seating is limited.
First 3 registered receive a free half hour telecoaching.
Call 602-316-7207
or email tanya@dynamiclifecoach.net

Message In a Problem

When starting any journey it is very wise to start where you are. The problem has come into our lives to help us uncover something that is getting in the way of what we really want, to experience our Isness, the Truth of who we are. In a sense the problem is the messenger, it’s just that the message seems to be in code. I know I for one think I’d prefer my message to come on a silver platter with maybe some chocolate covered strawberries or at least flowers, but either I don’t notice those messages or I don’t listen or follow through or something because my messages seem to come more with a kick in the butt! I keep saying I’m willing to get a softer kinder message, but I must pay more attention to the kick in the butt, two-by-four over the head kind, because that’s what I’ve gotten. Call me human!

Let me share what I have learned from all of these two-by-fours and bruised hind side. It has taught me to stop and listen!

Really, stop right now and ask your current problem what message it brings you. You can start with questions like,

What is the main problem?

What do I think about the problem?

What do I feel about the problem?

What are the hard cold facts?

What are my judgements?

What are my discernments?

Zentangles!

I've been crazy about zentangles lately.  This fun doodle art is both a great re-minder and a wonderful Creative Discovering tool.  I have been calling them zen-un-tangles!  They re-mind me how peaceful I am when I am engaged in a creative endeavor.  They have re-minded me of so much more.  More images and thoughts coming soon!

Wave Back

One of the things I have always loved to do is make a crazy face at a kid in the grocery store when no one else is looking or wave at a kid staring out a window in a passing car.  Today I was driving down the freeway with my two girls and one of their friends in the car.  They were listening to their music as loud as I could stand it and laughing and giggling with one another.  I happened to look over and notice a girl about 9 or 10 years old just a little ahead of us waving vigorously out the window at every car that passed with no response.

When we got pretty close to her I opened the sun roof and waved back.  Oh my gosh, this must have made her day.  I thought she was going to bounce right out of her seat belt.  She immediately turned to the girl next to her, who was probably about a year younger, who almost instantly hung as far over the first girl as possible to stick her arm out the window and wave back.  I waved again, and this got the attention of my girls.

Pretty soon all my girls and I and the two girls in the other car were enthusiastically waving at each other.  This caught the attention of four little kids sitting in the back seat of a car just in front of us.  You could see them get each others attention and soon they too were waving their hands at all of us.  Everyone in our car was laughing and excited to connect with these people who we've never seen before, and will probably never see again. 

It totally made my day, and it all started with one little girl continuing to wave even when no one was waving back!